Understanding the Roots of Jamie’s Actions - Adolescence, Transgenerational Trauma, and the Making of Jamie's Crime
After watching Adolescence, many people wonder: Why did Jamie commit such a terrible act? He didn’t experience overt trauma—his father just got angry occasionally, something many families normalize. How does this happen to children of well-intentioned, caring parents?
The answer lies in understanding transgenerational trauma and the risk factors that accumulate over time, shaping a person’s emotional world in ways that are often invisible until it’s too late.
A crucial factor is the generational gap—parents raise their children based on their own experiences, but when the world changes, those same approaches may no longer meet their children’s emotional needs.
The Hidden Impact of Transgenerational Trauma
Transgenerational trauma is the transmission of emotional wounds, coping mechanisms, and behavioral patterns from one generation to the next.
In Jamie’s case, his father experienced significant trauma from his own father, who was physically abusive. As Jamie’s father shared, his father would hit him very hard. This pattern of violence and emotional dysregulation was passed down, even if in a less overt form.
While Jamie’s father didn’t beat him, he still struggled with anger and impulsivity, which played out in destructive ways—such as smashing a shed in frustration and assaulting a child who graffitied his car. His reactions were unchecked and emotionally intense, revealing his lack of control.
Some might argue that Jamie’s father never killed anyone, so why did Jamie?
The reality is that a lack of emotional regulation, even when not expressed through extreme violence, still creates a volatile environment.
The combination of inherited impulsivity, toxic masculinity-inherited views, unprocessed emotions, unresolved emotional wounds, low self-worth, and external risk factors compounded Jamie’s struggles.
Environmental Differences: Why Jamie Went Further Than His Father
Jamie’s father, despite his temper, likely had access to emotional outlets that Jamie lacked:
A Stronger Social Network – Unlike Jamie, his father grew up in an era without electronics and social media, where friendships were often formed through unstructured play in the neighborhood, interactions with extended family, and community involvement. He may have spent time playing outside with friends for hours, having spontaneous social interactions, and developing a natural sense of belonging. Jamie, on the other hand, had limited in-person interactions outside of school. While he had a few acquaintances, he lacked deeper, more consistent real-world connections, leading to social isolation.
An Escape from Social Humiliation – Jamie’s father didn’t grow up in a time where bullying and embarrassment were permanent and inescapable. When he faced difficulties, he could physically remove himself from the situation. Jamie, however, lived in the age of social media, where humiliation followed him everywhere. Even at home, he couldn’t escape it, making his distress constant and overwhelming.
A Sense of Accomplishment – Jamie’s father seemed to have found success in something, as Jamie’s mother mentioned that he was Jamie’s inspiration. Having an identity tied to achievement likely gave him self-worth and resilience. Jamie, however, struggled to meet his father’s expectations, particularly in sports. The moment that hurt him the most was when he made a mistake in soccer his father simply looked away—signaling deep disappointment. This reinforced Jamie’s feelings of worthlessness.
Dismissal of His True Interests – Jamie had a passion for drawing and seemed to be good and passionate about it, but this was not celebrated or encouraged by his parents. Instead, his father placed greater emphasis on sports, likely because that fit his own vision of strength and masculinity.
By dismissing Jamie’s artistic interests, his parents unknowingly stripped him of an opportunity to build confidence and self-worth. If his passion had been nurtured, it could have provided him with a sense of purpose and identity, potentially preventing the deep-seated feelings of worthlessness and invalidation that contributed to his despair.
The Power of Shame, Rejection, Avoidance, and the Breaking Point
One of Jamie’s most painful memories was seeing his father look away in disappointment after he made a mistake in soccer. His father didn’t scold him, but that moment carried deep emotional weight. Shame, especially when it comes from a caregiver, is one of the most difficult emotions to process. In that moment, Jamie internalized the belief that he had little value in his father’s eyes.
This deep feeling of unworthiness played a major role in his crime. After Katy embarrassed him in public, Jamie wasn’t just hurt—he was reminded of his lack of worth. When she later rejected him after her own humiliation, it deepened his shame and crushed his self-esteem. He had hoped for acceptance, and when it was taken away in such a public way, his anger and resentment exploded.
Additionally, Jamie’s father avoided difficult conversations, leaving Jamie to process his emotions alone. Emotional avoidance in families can cause feelings of isolation, even when physical abuse isn’t present. Jamie didn’t have a safe space to talk about his emotions, reinforcing his loneliness and internal struggles. His parents’ avoidance of deep emotional discussions meant he lacked guidance in handling distress, making his shame and resentment even more overwhelming. A clear example of this was when he called his parents to say he was changing his declaration to guilty. His mother focused on trivial topics like food, while no one acknowledged or addressed his feelings.
Another example of emotional avoidance was his father’s reaction after the soccer game. His silent disappointment was a missed opportunity for emotional connection. Instead of helping Jamie process his distress, his father left him to interpret the silence as failure, deepening his sense of inadequacy. This pattern was also evident when his parents saw the monsters he drew but never asked him about them—another missed chance to understand his inner world.
The Role of Social Media in Emotional Distress
Social media played a crucial role in intensifying Jamie’s struggles. Unlike his father, who had the ability to escape social conflicts, Jamie lived in a world where bullying, embarrassment, and rejection followed him constantly. The permanence of online interactions meant that his pain was not temporary—it was replayed and reinforced daily. The lack of real-world emotional support, combined with the isolating effects of digital spaces, left Jamie vulnerable to the destructive emotions that ultimately drove him to violence.
Personality and Individual Differences in Coping
One of the key arguments Jamie’s mother made at the end of the series was that they raised both of their children the same way, yet their daughter did not end up like Jamie. This raises an important point: while transgenerational trauma and parenting styles play a significant role in shaping a child’s development, individual personality differences also determine how a child responds to those influences.
Jamie appeared to be more sensitive and introspective, which may have made him more vulnerable to feelings of shame and rejection.
His sister, on the other hand, may have had a more resilient temperament, a stronger social support system, or different coping mechanisms that allowed her to process challenges in a healthier way. Like Jamie said; “she was good a something, she was clever”.
Even within the same household, children can develop vastly different emotional landscapes based on their personalities, the specific dynamics they experience with each parent, and the ways they internalize those interactions.
Jamie’s sensitivity, combined with his unmet emotional needs and the invalidation of his interests, may have made him particularly susceptible to the risk factors present in his upbringing.
Why Didn’t Jamie Hurt Himself Instead of Katy?
One might wonder why Jamie turned his pain outward instead of inward. His initial intent may have been to scare Katy rather than kill her. However, given his family’s pattern of impulsivity, once his emotions took over, he lost control—just as his father did in moments of rage.
Conclusion - Understanding Not Justifying
Jamie’s father was, in many ways, a better parent than his own father. He did not physically abuse Jamie, and he seemed to want the best for him. However, being better than the previous generation does not mean being good enough for the next one.
The world Jamie grew up in was different, with unique challenges—constant digital exposure, social isolation, and emotional pain that went unprocessed. In addition, his relationship with his parents lacked deep emotional connection, as difficult conversations were often avoided. This created a generational pattern where emotions were left unaddressed, making it harder for Jamie to navigate his own struggles.
What Comes Next?
Understanding these risk factors is crucial, but just as important are the protective factors that could have prevented this tragedy. In a follow-up blog, we will explore what parents can do differently—including fostering emotional connection, teaching emotional regulation, and breaking generational cycles—to prevent similar outcomes for their children.
Biography:
Cristina is a licensed therapist and trauma specialist, with a focus on helping individuals heal from transgenerational trauma. Drawing from her own experiences as an immigrant, she offers a compassionate, culturally sensitive approach to therapy, guiding clients through their emotional struggles and helping them break free from inherited patterns of pain. As the founder of Empower U, Cristina is dedicated to supporting individuals in finding their true selves and overcoming generational challenges. When she’s not working with clients, Cristina enjoys writing and educating others about the impact of trauma, mental health, and healing.
